Should I Be Projectile Vomiting?

"Food becomes blood, blood becomes heart and brain, thoughts and mind stuff. Human fare is the foundation of human culture and thought. Would you improve a nation? Give it, instead of declamations against sin, better food. Man is what he eats." - Ludwig Andreas Feuerbach

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Never have truer words been spoken. We are affected by all that we digest through our eyes, ours mouths, through the air that we breathe. Food is one of the greatest (and sometimes sinful) pleasures in life that warms the heart and nurtures the soul. Good food unites nations and creates everlasting memories. Great food has the ability to transport us to another world or to take us home, wherever that may be.

It saddens me to think that despite being granted great opportunities, there are many deprived individuals who really have no idea what good food is. I have a small handful of friends who are vegetarian by choice although admittedly we don't talk much. And I do have an obsession with chicken.

I hold much respect for those who must refrain for reason of allergy and so forth (I myself have recently discovered that consuming crustaceans of some variety results in urticaria and indeed it takes a great deal of restraint despite knowing the dire consequences). And so it makes me terribly angry to discover that people don't really give a damn and will eat shit that resembles a shrunken foam mattress and be positive about it.

For the record, the crust-making technique is all wrong and it's disturbing that a jerk I mean woman with 38 years of eating experience thinks that coconut cream replicates the taste of egg in any way, shape or form. And on top of that, still hopes for some sort of book deal.

All I can say is: BLEURRGGGHH!