Sunday, April 19, 2009

It's Hectic Hollandaise Bro

I've had a hectic fortnight involving the police, a car crash, blackout and three attempted burglaries. Next Wednesday a new boundary fence will be erected (Dad was pushing for barbed wire but my Mother flat-out refused for beautification purposes) and I'll be attempting to rig up a home security camera system - an effort to get a photo of the poor excuse for a human being who keeps coming back to our house to break in through the kitchen window.

Unfortunately in Australia it's illegal to set traps on your own property for intruders which may cause physical harm or to defend your own goddamn private property unless your life is under threat and you are acting in self-defence.. PFFT! Luckily our house is less than a 5 minute drive away from the local police station. Too bad it takes them 4 freaking hours to get here on a Friday night. Occasionally I experience nostalgia for the days when it was perfectly acceptable to follow the fucker home and kick his teeth in to teach him a lesson or two.. Oh well..
The following is my recipe for verjuice hollandaise into which I stirred through a little pickled onion brunoise for texture and sweetness. I served it very simply - spooned over a salad of potato, bacon, tomato, asparagus and poached egg. A simple dish for when things get a little hectic.
Verjuice Hollandaise
35 g spanish onion, brunoise
3 g maldon sea salt
1 egg
28 g verjuice
55 g unsalted butter, melted
Sprinkle salt over onion and stir to combine.
Place in the refrigerator for 1 hour.
Whisk egg and verjuice vigorously over a baine marie until thickened (about 5-10 minutes).
Drizzle in butter, whisking continuously to emulsify.
Stir through pickled onion and serve warm.


  1. oh dude sorry to hear about your run of bad luck. are you able to use the excuse of "oh i didnt know that pile of sharp gardening tools were just sitting in the path"?

  2. hahaha i'll have to try that one! along with "oh that motion sensor taser gun pointed out the back window? it's just a decorative ornament!" :P

  3. That salad looks mighty tasty!

    Sorry to hear about the break-ins. Is there nothing that can be done about that window??

  4. i helped my dad stick wooden dowels into all ten of the downstairs window frames so that they can only be opened about 20cm and they can't be lifted out. mwuahahaha! i wish he'd come back though. i want to break his nose.


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